Failed Resolutions?

Failed Resolutions

Sadly, it’s no surprise as motivation is not to be relied upon. It’s happened to us all.

“Motivation is like a party animal friend. Great for a night out, but not someone you would rely on to pick you up from the airport. You must understand it roles and its limitations, then pick behaviours that don’t rely on such a fickle friend.” 

BJ Fogg.

So, why don’t our resolution get traction?

Here are the most common reasons:

Guessing, with no method.

You get a burst of motivation about starting running and, before you know it you find yourself at the sports shop buying all the gear. You wake up the following morning for your first run and… it’s raining hard and blowing a gale. Not what you expected. You decide not to go and you lose motivation. You are disappointed that you can’t get motivated to run in the rain. The next few days the weather improves, but the motivation has gone.

Why didn’t it work?
Maybe you didn’t buy the kit for a rainy day or maybe it was just a lovely day when you had the idea. But now, all of a sudden you’re feeling negative as yet again, you haven’t got going with your chosen activity.

Internet inspiration.
You click on Instagram and see the latest fitness guru with billions of followers. They look good and you think you’ll give his intense, 15 minute workout a go everyday through the lockdown. For a week, all is good. But then you wake up with a niggle in your knee. Still motivated, you decide to push on as you don’t know what to do and have no one to ask for advice. The knee gets worse and you have to stop.

Why didn’t it work?
There are multiple possible reasons. Maybe it was to much to soon, maybe the program was poorly designed or maybe your technique wasn’t up to scratch. You should take credit for giving it a good go but, it wasn’t chosen on any criteria apart from what excited you at that time.

Doing what worked for a friend.
Your friend drops a load of weight after signing up to a program. Motivated, you immediately sign up. You then find out that it involves getting up at 5am, not eating your favourite foods and getting to bed by 10pm – just as your favourite program is starting. Feeling super motivated, you still give it a go. But you break on day two after you stay up late watching your favourite program.

Why didn’t it work?
Doing what worked for a friend, doesn’t mean it’s a great fit for you. Your friend may well have an existing lifestyle that lends itself to making much smaller changes to follow the program. For you, it’s a seismic shift, and just to0 much.

The right way.

To build a behaviour that lasts, there are several steps we should take:

  1. Clarify your aspiration – will the behaviour you’re choosing help you reach your goal?
  2. Explore options. What would work well for you? What time can you commit? What support can you get if something doesn’t go to plan? And most importantly, is it something you think you’ll enjoy?
  3. Match with specific behaviours. No matter what behaviour you are looking to change, matching yourself with the right behaviour is key.

Matching specific behaviours or, Behaviour matching is the most important part in Behaviour Design and, is the key to changing your life for good. We call these ‘Golden Behaviours.’

A Golden Behaviour has three criteria:

  1. The behaviour is effective in realising your aspiration. It has impact.
  2. You want to do the behaviour. You’re motivated.
  3. You can do the behaviour. You have the ability.

We’ll look at ‘Focus Mapping’ next, which is the process we use to identify these golden behaviours.

Stay strong and feel free to reach out whenever…

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